Vicky Christina Barcelona

This is an interesting film, and it has me thinking about last night.
The movie is only 20 minutes in, and already i can tell I like the characters. 2 women go away to Barcelona for a summer. They meet a guy (a painter) who takes them on a random trip.

I love it.

Last night I met a couple who was visiting our bar. We were chatting and it came out that he was from Lebanon. Upon which I shouted how much I LOVE Beirut. Apparently, this is the best thing that I could have said, because after some conversation, we agreed to continue our dialogue and pretty much we agreed to converse about me working for their company. Based out of Lebanon, and traveling the region to do different projects, M&E....

Are you kidding me. This is like THE best news that I have heard in a very long time.
I mean, even with my pending career changing interview in exactly 20 days, I am still looking at other options... always looking at other options.

Well, such is the way of the world. The film is 54 minutes in. Penelope Cruz is in it. So that means that this has film has jumped to my top four...because Penelope...is kind of my prototype.

At least the characters that she has played.

Living in Beirut was a dream of mine that developed since the second I got off of the plane there. And the week just kept on getting better, and better, and better. And the culture, and the people that I met, and the life, and the parties, and the beaches...and the spirit of life.

While there I met some amazing artists. Photographers, painters, movie directors, art house curators, writers, actors...wow. So naturally, I was inclined to just pack up and go to art school there.
And then there was this picture that I saw. One of the creative types that I met there had taken a picture that she took of herself at 8:15 am while still lazing around in bed. It was beautiful. And there I went romanticizing about this ideal of waking up to an adventure everyday...starting with that early glimpse of life in her eyes.

Its not so much the job, or the exciting feeling of the place, its the newness. It is the not knowing. it is the feeling that tomorrow is different from today.
The world....

A day off

Ive decided that today is going to be my day off.

Because we were required to take 4 hours of HR training recently, I know it is beneficial for me to use my comp time, come home and relax, as opposed to saying something utterly true, but career changing.

So. Here I am. In my underwear and a T-shirt, lying on my bed an occasionally looking at the definition of my legs. . .
In an hour i will get up and paint. But then ill go back to sleep.

Talk about a bummy day. UGH. I think its REALLY time that I came home.

Family Life...and taxes

Its tax season, almost.

Technically you can turn your tax sheet in, and get your money by V-day (valentines not vagina) in your account. IF YOU ARE WISE.

Over the years, I have done this, did it early and did it often, well...just once.

This year though :( SMH, I cant. I mean, I HOPE I don't owe anything, but man o man o man o man, these mofos are anally raping me.

I don't want to do the numbers, but like...why did they take $33k from me in fed taxes.? Totally unfair. Then another $10k or so in State taxes....(stay with me, that's like $43k) Medicare $3k, Social Security $6k, retirement $11k (even though its mine later)...total deductions...roughly $63 and then with the insurance and life insurance that pushes it to $66k.

$66k...that's $66,000. That is so wrong on so many levels. I could support a FAMILY on the amount of deductions they took from me this year alone :(

But I guess...at the end of the day, at least I have a job snarf snarf.

Now, supposedly having a family reduces how much you have to pay in taxes. So...next logical step would be for me to get married, have kids, and save money...right? Uh, not so fast. That is a fallacy in my thought process, but then again, so is paying $66K in taxes. Ugh...maybe I should have bought a house last year too.

I FAIL.

Money FAIL :(

In office breath

Dear Person who comes to my desk to discuss important business,

Please approach me with Listerine in pocket. Because honestly.... I'm offended.

Have a pleasant afternoon.

Me.

Best Last Line in a Letter

Continuing with my theme so far this year. The last line in a letter I recently received. It is so pointed, ambiguous, definite, AWESOME (in my twisted head)...

"...I remember what was, sometimes wonder what could have been, and am grateful for what is. I'm going to stop wondering about what the future may hold for the two of us."

The last (two) sentences...well, I don't know what to say to that.

It is simple. It is honest. It is unassuming. It is witty.

Whoever wrote me that letter...
Thanks. I'm going to stop wondering too. . .

Worst Hangover Ever...kinda but not really

I am not someone you want to be with POST a night out drinking...at least not these days.

What do I do? I get all mushy gushy. Not like those girls in your college who were crying at the bar. Nope. I come home and cant stop playing Con Te Partiro on repeat, while sending out countless drunken text messages...via gchat (AMAZING in its own respect).



Now that I look back on last night. I am a wuss. lol.
I am now listening to Air and Simple Gifts....

Its a great way to motivate yourself to get out of bed at noon to do something Barack-like. Like getting lunch...or shaving. Or writing a book or even READING a book.

Damn you Italian Embassy. You bring out the worst in me....kinda.

Proximity does not guarantee friendship

Why why why do people in the workplace feel that because we sit desks apart that we are automatically considered facebook friends?

Tonight I was at one of the Embassy parties that occur often enough here and I saw a co-worker who sent me a facebook friend invite a few days ago. I had been thinking about how to approach the situation.
Do I
A: Limited profile them?
B: Keep on denying that I really use facebook anyway and that Ill accept when I log in?
C: Reject them and deny deny deny
D: Accept them, keep things PC for a week while they look through my pictures and notes, and then defriend them for a burger?

Ok, so each one has its merits and downsides. A is great because they can not see shit...but other people in the office have full access and someone will feel slighted.
B. they walk by my desk all the time and it is up.
C. sounding so awesome now.
D. Also very awesome but FB has taken the program down.

Hmm....what would you do?

Work place romances...kinda....

I would like to start off by saying, that I am NOT in one of those. My rule of thumb for the last few years has been to avoid them like the plague...simply because well, I have seen others take that path and have not been impressed with the results.

So how to avoid one when clearly someone seems NOT to get the point?
Avoid the person.
Great. But when you live on a compound more closely connected than a small college campus, and have multiple opportunities for awkward run ins....then what do you do?
Avoid the person.

I have been successfully using my 'Avoid the person' solution for a few months, and things seem to die down...but last week on the way to a meeting I saw the person and he tried to WAIT...HE?

YEP.
HE.

~~~Now, I am someone who feels that people have the right to do what they will, live how they will, and love how they want. At the same time, I appreciate those same people who understand that not everyone shares in their desire to love the same way or manner that they do. Particularly when it involves men showing interest in me. While I am flattered and all, and can understand how my charisma or clothing coordination (i work some pink in) can give you the gall to make a move. But my ducking and dodging and looks of NO!-ness should give you the hint that I am not interested.
Im already so picky when it comes to women, but come one Sam, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS" (if you name the source of the quote you get a cool post card from one of my trips)~~~~

He tries to corner me to chat or whatever, but I am not having it, plus im late for a meeting ...but now he knows that I am here.

I get a text this morning asking me to call him...no.
A few hours later I reply by text saying that Im super busy w/ deadlines and such and that I have no time.
The response is to call when the deadlines die.
I must say, if this is how it feels when women have to constantly fend off the advances of us guys. WOW. You girls have tough skin. Now im taking to camping out in my room, not answering the door, and turning off my phone after work... UGH.

I am so ready to move on.

A few major turning points in my life since the change of the new year. Some include gaining/regaining friends, some include losing amazing friends.
So 09 started off great in some regards and not so great in others. I have finally decided to stop being a wuss and move back to America for a little while. Whether its DC, ATL, NY, Cairo, Beirut, or even Istanbul..I have not decided, but I feel like when spring comes around, it will be high time for me to peace out.

How do you deal with office advances that just wont go away?

Its 9:30 AM...why do I smell like chlorine???

Because I went SWIMMING this morning!

(image courtesy of whynottri who might have got it from elsewhere..but thats not my biz)

If you have gleaned anything from my not mentioning it, I have become a bit of a gym rat. I enjoy working out, or really...I enjoy looking at myself post workout (both the same)...anyway. "The One Who Came Back" (I'm going to have to work on nicknames), convinced me to participate in a triathlon. Not just any triathlon, but one with her. Like we would be doing it together- Enough of a reason to work break my back for 6 months getting enough stamina to not only compete in one of these, but finish in a relatively good enough position to NOT look like a wuss!

OK, so the training regime that I am on is different than the workout routine that I have been on since October/November. This time, it starts of really small (12 min swim/24 min bike), and then increases intensity over the next 4 months.

In my past (3 years ago), my job was teaching people-kids, adults, babies, athletes, Dr's, housewives, househusbands, etc...- on how to swim better...but I HATE swimming. I don't actually mind it, but I do mind initially getting INTO the water. That shock...ugh. It took me 4 mins to just do it. Im like the fat kid in the locker room...take it off already...FAIL.

(Photo from here )

So yes. Here is to a great first day of training for the triathlon. Luckily food here is FREE. So I can eat healthy. Health care is free- So I can see the Dr/Nutritionist/Podiatrist/and Dentist for good measure- over the course of my training routine to ensure that I remain healthy.

AND EVEN MORE AWESOME...we have this thing in the office where we all get Pedometers and are pretending to WALK to some far city....so I am wearing a Pedometer!!! Wooo hooo.

Yeah fitness..wooo hoo!!!!

not really, but you get the point.

On another note:

Today is the day. President ELECT Barack Obama will be sworn in as The President of the United States of America.

If you live under a rock (or in Iraq...same thing), you may not know this...so I am sharing the news. And sharing is Caring.

Good Bye W.

The Best VChat EVER

OK,
So maybe this year is a year of superlatives. I got the best txt message ever, will be taking an exam that could change my life (in another month, will be posting on this later), have made it to the Golden City of Dubai...and now, THIS.

Last night right before tucking into bed I got a 'hello' from a friend of mine. To say friend is really to make light of what we were...but then that sounds like it is too heavy.

Pretty much, she was a cutie interning where I was temping in DC. We went on a few dates, watched a film or two, did the adult dance a few times, and then I left. . . and it was a weird place for us because we were only beginning to understand how to talk with each other and then the communication changed...I left. (reoccurring theme in my life...left the country, not left the relationship).

Fast forward a couple of years (19 months) and I'm talking to her last night. I to DC foften, and I was thinking it would be nice to see her in the evenings that I was not working. She agreed. But then I asked her to define what we were. Because you know...things change.

That's a hard thing to have someone pose to you, but she handled it with grace and said

"If you are looking for something long term, I am not necessarily sure that is what I want right now, however...if you are looking at having a good time whenever we are in the same city [and I'm single and you're single... I am totally OK with that."..."I guess you could call me your, um...Mistress???"

We wrangled over nomenclature for a while, and laughed it out. We are friends. And at the end of the day, that is important to me.


Personally, when I think about it...I am OK with this. I mean, recognizing and being OK with not being physically and emotionally available in different parts of the world is healthy.

And im not saying it is how things will play out, because situations change all the time.
Your thoughts? Experiences?

Love in the time of Cholera

I FINALLY got around to watching this movie, despite being told by many people that it was not worth my time.
I would like to say, all those other people have no idea what a good movie is!.

First of, the characters were real...well, I would totally talk about the names and the synopsis that really is not my deal.

Ok, pretty much what I grasp from the film is that a man is dedicated despite the odds.
The guy, Florintino or whatever his name is loves this woman all his life, despite the fact that she doesnt see it...until the end.
The film feels like it is the ultimate game of playing hard to get. Damn women...grrrrrr. Making this poor man go through his life devoted to this woman who just ignored him his whole life.

But then again, the guy in the film is kind of a loser and a hero at the same time for waiting. I too know what it is to wait :/

The amazing thing is that he kept a record of the woman he slept with.....genius.

Now I am watching "The Changeling" with the Angelina Jolie character....interesting film, and I think I see where it is going.

Saw Madagascar 2 the other night. It was interesting all the way until the middle of the film when it started to speak Russian...and then I was like whazzat??? But then it went back to American and I continued drinking my sixpack and all was good.

Woo Hoo.

The Work Place

I try not to let work dictate how I go about doing my one-two step. But sadly, I do not have too many options when it comes to getting away from the people I work with due to the relative compactness of our living situation. I.E. we are VERY confined to the compound.

So the other day when I found out the my new boss/not-boss was interfering with my carefully laid plans to get additional training back in the States which would also allow me to take a VERY crucial career changing exam, and also attend a wedding of one of my close friends....lets say that I was not very happy.

But cooler heads prevailed and I did not tender my resignation and will be able to go back after all, but Ill be buying the international travel portion of the trip (whats $1500 in airfare?). Bleh, its whatever, but you know...Id much rather have not had to pay for it on my own, but like I said it is career changing.

I get an email from a friend telling me that the same boss is pissed off because I didnt consult her when hiring a new employee. Why the hell did she not come to me, but go around and complain to people in the office about the issue? Who knows, I have the feeling that she is intimidated by me.

O well.
Ill still be looking for that new position, but the pressure isnt all there as yet, I can afford to take it easy a bit and keep this ace in my hole.

So it appears like Ill be back in America in a month. WOOOO HOOO!!!

Today...

Is turning out to be very very very trying.

Ive just gotten back from my vacation, I am NOT supposed to be in the I WANT TO QUIT mode already.

Wow...

Breathe...stretch....look for another job...

In that order.

The Officeness of it all.

Now that I am back to my post and to some sense of normalcy, it’s high time that all that’s happened is placed on the table. The trip to America was so enlightening and enjoyable and horrible and exciting and sexy and expensive and cheap and all of that good stuff that if for anything, I need to have a mental picture.

The easiest way would probably do things by city…but that’s lame. I’m just going to let it out.
More than anything, this trip was the determining factor of ‘can I come back?’. It is weird, but I have been thinking about it for the longest time. Like my self imposed exile off the island finally allowed me to come to sense with who I am and what I want to do and maybe it really is ok to NOT be the adventurer and ‘that guy’ all the time. Perhaps it is something that other 20somethings think about often, but meh…who knows. As soon as I got off the plane in DC and rode the bus (yeah, I could have taken a hired car, but the bus allowed me to SEE people) I knew that I would enjoy it. Supposedly there is a recession going on, but did I see one? No, not really.
Work was work, pretty bleh, but there was a cute new girl in the DC office that I got a chance to flirt with quite a bit.

Old flames… this trip would be peppered by old flames. Some of them genuine, some of them nostalgic for what could have been, or what was on the table, and some just downright wanted to make it miserable for anyone else. Thankfully the latter only had a brief phone call and nothing more.

Old flames tend to be dangerous. Because at one point all of the good feelings that we had for them tend to resurface, but then so do the bad. Why didn’t it work out? {Oh…so NOOOOOW you can see me while you have a bf, but before you couldn't ??? }
Old flames also tend to be so much fun…enough said about that.

There were also new flames, and ugh, its so sad that all I wanted to do was flirt with the most beautiful girl in the room…in every room. I did not get any new numbers, but I totally chatted up lots of fun and single girls. DWP would marvel at how much shit I could talk to new girls and have them still smiling with me. I even got a girl to buy my brother and I a drink at a bar, and when she was like…shouldn’t you be doing this?. I convinced her that it was a great idea that she did it because ‘CHANGE’ was upon us.

I feel kind of sad though. A friend of mine is having a hard time dating despite the fact that she is BEAUTIFUL and Intelligent. Maybe guys are timid, but then again, a lot of the guys that she meets seem to have deeper issues (like girlfriends, or unhealthy addictions-heroin/gambling). Shes great, and I think at one time, she was the apple in my eye, but then time and effort and focus shifted and when little things started to become larger things between us…well, it was better to be the friend with her than be THE friend with her.
Distance is hard. The distance is the hardest part of being away. Long distance is fine to point, but when that is all that there is…well, wow. On one hand absence makes the heart grow fonder, but on the other, it strains the heart past the breaking point on so many occasions, a little misunderstanding can become so big if things go unchecked. I am a victim of it just like many people that I know. The awful truth of it all lies in the fact that I need a bit more than just a smiley face to be ok about a situation…I'm 25,I really need to have that booty talk when the need arises.

Wait…America.

Going to DC was great because I was in great company and have amazing friends in that city. Easily one of the ones I can go back to and be content.
Going to Atlanta…was intense. I kind of always dread that city because of the memories of the place, but then I kind of love going because of those same memories. HS wasn’t that much of a yippee, and college wasn’t either. Living in the city was great at times, but then at the same time I was horrible at going out and socializing because I felt that ATL was too dangerous at times. It really is where you go. And now that I know where is where and my friends are knowledgeable about the spots (And the awesomeness of the IPhone and IPod touch and its handy dandy apps) I can choose the cool places in a matter of seconds.

In Atlanta. There was a lot of people that I didn’t get to see. Like the girl who I went out with a 6 years ago on the date where she was kinda stepping out on her BF… and then there were the people that I got to see but didn’t spend enough time with (like my mom- who has become so damn awesome while getting her PhD)…and those who I wish I could have had more time with…(again my mom, but others as well). I had to tell someone that my heart wasn’t in it anymore…I think that is another post, but goes back down to the whole distance thing…and another told me that loved me and has for the past 5 year (that thing about old flings). I don’t think my heart could take the daily ups and downs of that trip, but I survived.

At 25. I love way too hard. I fall way too far. And rebound way too short. I invite people in without walls, and let them out without looking back. Maybe I’m fickle. But then again, I am only human. I want to be loved just for being me, but then I don’t want to be loved for pity’s sake (I doubt this has happened).

There was a put up or shut up moment in the trip when I was in Dubai and a couple pretty much invited me to share the night with them…

Hehe, I love the travel life, and the single life is cool too. But I think it is coming to a close. Honestly. After this last one, I think I’m going to become a hermit from here on out.

New Years Resolution

I dont do these...well, I dont do them and look at the list often enough to know what the last years resolution was.

Anyway, considering that we are in a downturn, I want my resolution to be:
Put away 6 figures in some sort of saving vehicle.
Yes, having money is the root of all evil, but not having money is the root of all evil.

Things are in a good place for me, and tomorrow when I get back to work after a 3 week vacation, Ill see how good things really are.

Its damn near 4 am and I am not asleep yet...not good, but whatever, maybe ill go and do laundry and then go to the gym before work.

I love this city

I am not sure if I am loving the city, or if I am loving the amenities of the city. The luxury of this place is incredible.

But also lurking under the surface of society is tension between the citizens and non citizens. But at the end of the day, I like it. Could live here even.



Just a little taste of what it is like.
Like I said, more pictures and such to to come :)

Best Text Message Ever

So rn't we supposed 2 get married now that i'm 30. Or r u betrothed 2 some1 else?....


That came from my first girlfriend. She is 5 years older than I am, so of course I thought that I would not REALLY have to answer that question or live up to that pact, but now that I am 25, single, and shes 30, single, and has 2 beautiful little boys whom I am sure I can adore....BUT, at the same time...meh...


This has had to be one of the most dynamic trips to America in a long long time. SO much has changed. I still dont have much time to recap it, but Ill do it when I get to Dubai tomorrow night :) Yay for 12 hour flights. Or actually, I think ill write about it on the flight.

Plus pictures.

Happy New Year

I will return, but America is keeping me a bit busy...all that cake and such.