Another Cycle, and a Critical Look

I have seen it happen before, but none before just now. It hit me again after I got of the phone with my last pseudo girlfriend.
She was engaged. Taken to the top of the Eiffel tower and proposed to. How cliche yes, but according to the people in my office, cliche works. If it aint broke...dont fix it right .... right.

Or something like that. I tend to find myself dating girls who are in a whole unattainable, and then when I do have them, I do something ridiculous like let them go, or write them off and blame it on my travel schedule. True, my affinity for travel trumps my desire for closeness and continuity. Dont get me wrong I have tended to maintain contact with these women for an incredible amount of time, like...years...but never going there...or once they are there but change, they tend not to go back to where they were.

It is a complexed set of events, but even more so now that a majority of my friends are in seriously committed relationships, or are considering popping the questions, or have popped the question, or have children, or just doing SOMETHING regarding that next step. And no matter how much it hits me that I could and should also be working towards that end, I seem to be...not getting anywhere.

It is almost silly though. I mean, I have the option and the grace of all these women, but still have not found her. Crazy thing is...I have found her so many times that its just ridiculous that I am not WITH the HER. I think that kind of thing changes often as well.

Gladly I have long since given up the feeling sorry for myself because she was not around attitude and have accepted to adapt to every situation as it comes.
I know I have the skills to woe them, I have the skills to make them love me. It is embedded into my genes...just like my daddy.
But still, the desire to connect on that level is strong. Not seeing women as objects was easy, seeing them as life partners, also easy...actually finding my life partner, well that one will take some work I suppose.

I feel like I am not destined to be one like the rest.
It has been so and will always be so.

And here I am. At 25. Single. No kids. Many loves. five years to go.